Rape With Consent

There was one afternoon when my boyfriend and I were watching a movie at my pad when there was a scene where the man was forcing his girlfriend to have sex with him. My boyfriend thought it was pretty pathetic that the man had to rape his own girlfriend. I replied that rape was something he would never experience with me because I was only too willing to make love with him.

Then last Tuesday, I asked him to come over as I was feeling particularly horny. He agreed with alacrity. But when I was getting down to business - giving him a blowjob the way he liked it - I was annoyed that he was still texting. Since he was using his personal phone and it was past 9pm, it could only be you-know-who. I abruptly stopped what I was doing, turned my back on him, and tried to sleep. He protested at that and started kissing and petting me, but I kept pushing him away, turning my head when he tried to kiss me. Although I was getting turned on (because I wasn't kidding when I said that I am always ready to make love with him), I made it hard for him. I didn't want him to stop, but I'm not going to participate. It was rape with consent, if there's such a thing. He had to tear my clothes off and I continued to be unresponsive even when he was inside me. I finally gave in though, when he introduced a new position that really rocked my world. All in all, it was amazing sex.

But after we got our breath back, I told him that I was still miffed. When he asked why, I said that he was already with me, and I was already kissing him, but his mind was still with her. I don't mind him calling or texting her in my presence, but not when we were having sex, thank you very much. He said that he couldn't not text back because she would call if he didn't reply immediately - and that would be a bigger problem if we were already getting it on. I just said that it's what made me lost interest. He laughed when I added that it was a good thing for him that I love sex so much that I only lost interest very temporarily.

I had my period today so I need to tell him that our weekend is off. It doesn't really hinder our sexual activities (my appetite is the same and he's not squeamish), but I thought that one weekend a month away from each other would help. I just use my period as an excuse to have time for myself and keep things at the proper perspective - I was already getting too emotionally dependent on him. For something that is decidedly temporary, this spells trouble, so this was what I decided at the time when we agreed to step back and evaluate our relationship.