There was one afternoon when my boyfriend and I were watching a movie at my pad when there was a scene where the man was forcing his girlfriend to have sex with him. My boyfriend thought it was pretty pathetic that the man had to rape his own girlfriend. I replied that rape was something he would never experience with me because I was only too willing to make love with him.
Then last Tuesday, I asked him to come over as I was feeling particularly horny. He agreed with alacrity. But when I was getting down to business - giving him a blowjob the way he liked it - I was annoyed that he was still texting. Since he was using his personal phone and it was past 9pm, it could only be you-know-who. I abruptly stopped what I was doing, turned my back on him, and tried to sleep. He protested at that and started kissing and petting me, but I kept pushing him away, turning my head when he tried to kiss me. Although I was getting turned on (because I wasn't kidding when I said that I am always ready to make love with him), I made it hard for him. I didn't want him to stop, but I'm not going to participate. It was rape with consent, if there's such a thing. He had to tear my clothes off and I continued to be unresponsive even when he was inside me. I finally gave in though, when he introduced a new position that really rocked my world. All in all, it was amazing sex.
But after we got our breath back, I told him that I was still miffed. When he asked why, I said that he was already with me, and I was already kissing him, but his mind was still with her. I don't mind him calling or texting her in my presence, but not when we were having sex, thank you very much. He said that he couldn't not text back because she would call if he didn't reply immediately - and that would be a bigger problem if we were already getting it on. I just said that it's what made me lost interest. He laughed when I added that it was a good thing for him that I love sex so much that I only lost interest very temporarily.
I had my period today so I need to tell him that our weekend is off. It doesn't really hinder our sexual activities (my appetite is the same and he's not squeamish), but I thought that one weekend a month away from each other would help. I just use my period as an excuse to have time for myself and keep things at the proper perspective - I was already getting too emotionally dependent on him. For something that is decidedly temporary, this spells trouble, so this was what I decided at the time when we agreed to step back and evaluate our relationship.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Not Another Love Story
Finally, my bestfriend and I were able to firm up our movie date. I asked her to see A Love Story with me since the movie was supposed to be about a man's relationship with his wife and his mistress, and she's one of the very few who knows about my secret life. I thought it might be a movie I could relate to.
We decided to see the last full show and just meet at the mall, since we were coming from opposite directions. She will be coming from Manila with her family (husband, daughter, and nanny) while I will be brought to the mall by my dad. Yeah, I know I live a weird double life. Even my bestfriend's husband commented on it - that I probably tried all the sex tricks possible but my dad still treats me like a 16 year old virgin.
Well anyway, we were all able to see the 9pm show and it fell short of my expectations. In the first place, I'm not really a big fan of local movies, but I guess it got too hyped in my imagination. (A movie about me!) It's good enough as local movies go, but the story certainly didn't pull at my heartstrings. Oh, there were a few lines that felt similar ("sobra, kahit alam ko nang mali") and some scenes were really a mistress' living nightmare (seeing your boyfriend happily malling with his wife). I even remember doing some of the actions myself (saying goodbye and boxing up clothes) but I couldn't really relate as I thought I would. It just comforted me that there are some people who would understand why a woman with means and status would decide to be a mistress. It somehow challenged the stereotype of a mistress who uses sex for money.
So there it was. The movie date over, we repaired to Starbucks for my goddaughter's cheesecake fix and caught up with each others' lives. Even if it wasn't the movie that I expected, the good time I had with my friends certainly was. =)
We decided to see the last full show and just meet at the mall, since we were coming from opposite directions. She will be coming from Manila with her family (husband, daughter, and nanny) while I will be brought to the mall by my dad. Yeah, I know I live a weird double life. Even my bestfriend's husband commented on it - that I probably tried all the sex tricks possible but my dad still treats me like a 16 year old virgin.
Well anyway, we were all able to see the 9pm show and it fell short of my expectations. In the first place, I'm not really a big fan of local movies, but I guess it got too hyped in my imagination. (A movie about me!) It's good enough as local movies go, but the story certainly didn't pull at my heartstrings. Oh, there were a few lines that felt similar ("sobra, kahit alam ko nang mali") and some scenes were really a mistress' living nightmare (seeing your boyfriend happily malling with his wife). I even remember doing some of the actions myself (saying goodbye and boxing up clothes) but I couldn't really relate as I thought I would. It just comforted me that there are some people who would understand why a woman with means and status would decide to be a mistress. It somehow challenged the stereotype of a mistress who uses sex for money.
So there it was. The movie date over, we repaired to Starbucks for my goddaughter's cheesecake fix and caught up with each others' lives. Even if it wasn't the movie that I expected, the good time I had with my friends certainly was. =)
Monday, August 27, 2007
Wild Sex ... On Nat Geo
I had to work late Friday night as my staff had a lot of catching up to do while I had a budget to dream up. Yes, dream up - since I don't have any basis for the numbers I'm churning out. Anyway, I finally called it quits at past nine, but only because I had two employees competing in a nearby badminton challenge and I promised that I would cheer them on.
And cheer them I did, even if they lost the game. But I was tired and hot and hungry during the walk home (the court was just a block away from my pad) and I wondered what time my boyfriend would arrive. I called him as soon as I arrived home and found out that he was still home, preparing the stuff he was bringing over. I breathed in relief. That means I still have time to order pizza, tidy up the place, and take a bath.
Sure enough, I was cozy in bed (smelling of passion fruit), the pizza and chicken waiting in the fridge, and watching TV when he finally arrived. I made him a cup of coffee and we snuggled while watching Nat Geo. Soon, the cuddles became heavy petting, and soon we were having sex. I don't know what's with him, but I ain't complaining. He had me screaming for mercy long before he finally finished with me. I was so happy and sated that I got up and fixed him a midnight snack. After the pizza and chips and chocolate, I couldn't keep my eyes open, even if I liked watching Vanessa Williams in Dance With Me, and he cuddled me to sleep in amusement.
We woke up at 9 on Saturday morning and had sex for breakfast. Again, I was seeing fireworks and had to beg him for a break since I thought I was going to have an asthma attack. After a five minute breather, he changed condoms and we were at it again. It was so amazing that I still get hot just remembering it.
We spent most of the day in bed, eating, watching dvds and basketball, talking shop and about ourselves, our limbs entwined. We decided to have dinner at our favorite resto at the mall before I went home to the province for the weekend. We were already dressed and ready to go when Nat Geo featured Wild Sex. It's a very interesting documentary and we sat down to finish it, but soon enough, all that wild sex on TV had me kneeling to give him a blow job while we watched. A few minutes later, we were both naked again and doing it in my kitchen and finally finishing it on my bed. When we came up for air, it was already a different feature on TV and I was somewhat relieved to find that the focus was not even remotely connected to sex. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to stand, much less walk.
It certainly worked up an appetite for dinner and I slept soundly on the bus ride home.
And cheer them I did, even if they lost the game. But I was tired and hot and hungry during the walk home (the court was just a block away from my pad) and I wondered what time my boyfriend would arrive. I called him as soon as I arrived home and found out that he was still home, preparing the stuff he was bringing over. I breathed in relief. That means I still have time to order pizza, tidy up the place, and take a bath.
Sure enough, I was cozy in bed (smelling of passion fruit), the pizza and chicken waiting in the fridge, and watching TV when he finally arrived. I made him a cup of coffee and we snuggled while watching Nat Geo. Soon, the cuddles became heavy petting, and soon we were having sex. I don't know what's with him, but I ain't complaining. He had me screaming for mercy long before he finally finished with me. I was so happy and sated that I got up and fixed him a midnight snack. After the pizza and chips and chocolate, I couldn't keep my eyes open, even if I liked watching Vanessa Williams in Dance With Me, and he cuddled me to sleep in amusement.
We woke up at 9 on Saturday morning and had sex for breakfast. Again, I was seeing fireworks and had to beg him for a break since I thought I was going to have an asthma attack. After a five minute breather, he changed condoms and we were at it again. It was so amazing that I still get hot just remembering it.
We spent most of the day in bed, eating, watching dvds and basketball, talking shop and about ourselves, our limbs entwined. We decided to have dinner at our favorite resto at the mall before I went home to the province for the weekend. We were already dressed and ready to go when Nat Geo featured Wild Sex. It's a very interesting documentary and we sat down to finish it, but soon enough, all that wild sex on TV had me kneeling to give him a blow job while we watched. A few minutes later, we were both naked again and doing it in my kitchen and finally finishing it on my bed. When we came up for air, it was already a different feature on TV and I was somewhat relieved to find that the focus was not even remotely connected to sex. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to stand, much less walk.
It certainly worked up an appetite for dinner and I slept soundly on the bus ride home.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Still Alive and Happy
It's been almost a month since my last blog, but my life wasn't at a standstill during the gap. I guess it was because a lot happened that I haven't had time to sort my thoughts to make it in any way bloggable.
Work:
Well, August is promotion month at our company. Since I just got promoted last year, I wasn't expecting any for my group - who are all composed of newbies. Perhaps next year, some of my staff will be promoted. But my boyfriend was expecting a promotion. This was the reason why we haven't seen much of each other lately. He usually stays late at the office, and understanding girlfriend that I am, I just head home instead of demanding time with him. Actually, there was a time when he decided not to come over even when we agreed to spend time together. He went out with his boss and was too tipsy to go to my place. We had a row then, and agreed to step back and evaluate things since I felt that he was being too selfish. Unfortunately though, his promotion didn't push through - my guess is that their group went beyond the quota of promotees - and now my job is to cheer him on since he lost his zest for work. I really hate his work. First, he had to work hard so that I couldn't spend time with him and we even quarreled because of it. Now, I have to pretend and tell him that working is good to cheer him up from depression. His boss should pay me for managing his emotions. Grr.
On another note, a friend and I started our monthly sessions with our mentor, on how to improve our managing skills. We held it at my pad and it went longer than we expected. But it was enlightening and gave me a direction (at least for the month) on how I could improve.
We've also started planning and budgeting for next year. And although doing this is one giant migraine, I'm somewhat psyched about it. I guess I'm getting tired of justifying expenses that are beyond the current year's budget. I hope I can do better forecasting for next year.
Friends and Family:
I haven't seen my friends (outside work) lately. The last time I saw my highschool friends was when one of them visited from UK. Well, another friend visited from Singapore, but I wasn't able to meet up with him (and I'm still waiting for the chocolates he brought us). I'll probably meet up with my bestfriend this weekend. We wanted to see the latest movie which features a guy with a wife and a mistress. Three guesses on why I wanted to watch the film. =)
When I suddenly had free time, I asked my girlfriend to meet me at the mall. I was sorry I did, because it ended up in a row between her and her boyfriend who was with her at the time. I did not know they were on a date. Sheesh. I quickly apologized and said we could meet next time. Who else could understand quality time better but me?
My family held a surprise baby shower for my sister in law last weekend and we had a great time. She enjoyed the party and the gifts, and I enjoyed spending time with the entire family (complete with all the little ones) even if it proved to be stressful when I had to watch out for the two little boys. We also had our usual sibling rivalry when it was time to entertain the guests. Since my brother achieved a perfect score with his song, I had to do a dance number (of the pole dancing variety) when it was my turn to sing. Of course, they teased me mercilessly since I gained a lot of weight and it showed on my butt, but since I also got a perfect score, I was able to peacefully sit down and heckle the rest of the performers. My sister got a perfect score too but our eldest only got 99 (since she was foolish enough to choose a non-foolproof song like the rest of us did). My dad recorded my performance on his phone and I texted my bestfriend about it. She said that I must be subconsciously letting my family know about my secret life. I told her that my dad would probably accept a stripper for a daughter rather than a mistress.
Lovelife:
Well, as I said, we went through a lot of bumps because of his work, but I think we were able to compromise. As my girlfriend said, it's not quantity of time but the quality. Whenever we could spend time together, whoa! Sex was like you wouldn't believe. And the talking and the eating and the laughing and the cuddling... Life is good.
He's also quite a morale booster in a different way. When I kept getting comments from different people on how I was putting on weight, he told me that they were just envious because I can afford to buy a lot of food and eat in good restos. He told me not to mind them. I was healthy and happy, and he loves me.
Work:
Well, August is promotion month at our company. Since I just got promoted last year, I wasn't expecting any for my group - who are all composed of newbies. Perhaps next year, some of my staff will be promoted. But my boyfriend was expecting a promotion. This was the reason why we haven't seen much of each other lately. He usually stays late at the office, and understanding girlfriend that I am, I just head home instead of demanding time with him. Actually, there was a time when he decided not to come over even when we agreed to spend time together. He went out with his boss and was too tipsy to go to my place. We had a row then, and agreed to step back and evaluate things since I felt that he was being too selfish. Unfortunately though, his promotion didn't push through - my guess is that their group went beyond the quota of promotees - and now my job is to cheer him on since he lost his zest for work. I really hate his work. First, he had to work hard so that I couldn't spend time with him and we even quarreled because of it. Now, I have to pretend and tell him that working is good to cheer him up from depression. His boss should pay me for managing his emotions. Grr.
On another note, a friend and I started our monthly sessions with our mentor, on how to improve our managing skills. We held it at my pad and it went longer than we expected. But it was enlightening and gave me a direction (at least for the month) on how I could improve.
We've also started planning and budgeting for next year. And although doing this is one giant migraine, I'm somewhat psyched about it. I guess I'm getting tired of justifying expenses that are beyond the current year's budget. I hope I can do better forecasting for next year.
Friends and Family:
I haven't seen my friends (outside work) lately. The last time I saw my highschool friends was when one of them visited from UK. Well, another friend visited from Singapore, but I wasn't able to meet up with him (and I'm still waiting for the chocolates he brought us). I'll probably meet up with my bestfriend this weekend. We wanted to see the latest movie which features a guy with a wife and a mistress. Three guesses on why I wanted to watch the film. =)
When I suddenly had free time, I asked my girlfriend to meet me at the mall. I was sorry I did, because it ended up in a row between her and her boyfriend who was with her at the time. I did not know they were on a date. Sheesh. I quickly apologized and said we could meet next time. Who else could understand quality time better but me?
My family held a surprise baby shower for my sister in law last weekend and we had a great time. She enjoyed the party and the gifts, and I enjoyed spending time with the entire family (complete with all the little ones) even if it proved to be stressful when I had to watch out for the two little boys. We also had our usual sibling rivalry when it was time to entertain the guests. Since my brother achieved a perfect score with his song, I had to do a dance number (of the pole dancing variety) when it was my turn to sing. Of course, they teased me mercilessly since I gained a lot of weight and it showed on my butt, but since I also got a perfect score, I was able to peacefully sit down and heckle the rest of the performers. My sister got a perfect score too but our eldest only got 99 (since she was foolish enough to choose a non-foolproof song like the rest of us did). My dad recorded my performance on his phone and I texted my bestfriend about it. She said that I must be subconsciously letting my family know about my secret life. I told her that my dad would probably accept a stripper for a daughter rather than a mistress.
Lovelife:
Well, as I said, we went through a lot of bumps because of his work, but I think we were able to compromise. As my girlfriend said, it's not quantity of time but the quality. Whenever we could spend time together, whoa! Sex was like you wouldn't believe. And the talking and the eating and the laughing and the cuddling... Life is good.
He's also quite a morale booster in a different way. When I kept getting comments from different people on how I was putting on weight, he told me that they were just envious because I can afford to buy a lot of food and eat in good restos. He told me not to mind them. I was healthy and happy, and he loves me.
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